Okay, Now I KNOW I'm Getting Old


Chip and I live quite close to a high school, and frequently see kids on their way to class in the mornings when we're (or rather now, just I am) leaving for work.

Such was the case this morning when I was walking to my car. I saw a teenaged kid, walking down the sidewalk, headed in the direction of University High. He was wearing a knit cap, black graphic tee with a slouchy black hoodie, and those horrible skinny jeans all the kids are wearing these days.

The thing was, these jeans were belted around his ass somewhere south of his butt cheeks.

Now, when I was a kid, this was all the rage for the boys, particularly those aiming for a more urban look. To this day, I don't see how that is terribly comfortable, but back in MY day, the jeans were baggy. Really, REALLY baggy. Such was the style.

Somehow, kids today still think that showing the whole of their boxer graphic pattern is cool. Fine. I don't like it, I don't get it, but you're a punk kid and that's your prerogative, and I will just walk faster and pass you on the sidewalk so I don't have to look at it.

But dude, DUDE! (I am still young enough to be able to use "dude" as a part of my regular lexicon.) This kid with the skinny jeans belted around the lower orbs of his ass had to pause every three steps to hike them up. Apparently so they wouldn't fall off. I don't know. I don't claim to understand the physics of skinny jeans, and how FUGLY PANTS THAT LOOK LIKE THEY WERE PAINTED ON CAN STILL DROOP AND THREATEN TO FALL OFF.

I didn't mean to yell that. It's just that I am overcome with the same disgust-filled rage I was this morning that made me want to run across the street, grab the kid's pants by the belt loops, yank up really hard and yell "BUY some PANTS that FIT! God!"

Okay. I guess I'm not as okay with teenaged style prerogatives as I thought.

That's how I know I'm getting OLD.


2008-02-26 10:45 a.m.

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